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may 21

swarthmore is winding down; everyone is watching james bond flicks and playing goldeneye (nintendo 64) and packing up four years of shit
  except me.

i'm in san francisco, eight days and ten pages until graduation.

today:
is this what descrimination feels like?
is it all in my mind?

i lost my sense of humour on the airport shuttle. the bayporter driver agreed to drop me off in west oakland on the way to berkeley if everyone else agreed. otherwise i would have to wait for at least one and a half hours before he circled back to oakland last. strange, because it's on the way. why would they go there last? and it costs more too, even though it's closer to the airport. so this one older dude says like "i'd like to go to berkeley first" and i'm like, "so i get to pay five dollars extra to get a fucking midnight driving tour of berkeley?" and then i apologized and took my bag and took the bart.

maybe i left a hot little psychic ball of pent up frustration, i said, i couldn't resist, i felt uppity, on my way out of the van, because all of this really made little sense to me, until i thought about it economically, and then racially and i said, "well i guess that's what i get for living where the black people live" because of course they were all white and asian heading to berkeley and i have to pay more and wait longer to go somewhere that's closer by?

anyways, that's just a reminder that i'm not all fun and games; i have my righteous indignation side and sometimes i just don't know - it would be more effective to be mellow, but in this case i still think i was right, even though i can understand that old dude might have wanted to go home. sorry guy. he probably didn't think about it too long. so it was bayporter shuttle, i'm writing the name bayporter airport shuttle more than once so this page comes up on an internet search for that bayporter shuttle name. i thought about writing them a letter, maybe i will. but at least for now i can gripe online.

because really there aren't many other options - supershuttle, the nationwide airport shuttle company, doesn't go to oakland (or berkeley) anymore (as of '97 anyways). everybody charges extra for this part of town. is it dangerous? under-trafficked? i guess i optimistically believe the latter; when more people need shuttles to oakland, competition will drive the prices down and shit. that's my introduction to economics talking, yikes.

turned in my thesis (online); was it done? never!

last minute research revealed that doctor jack kevorkian, assisted suicide man, has an oil painting proficiency and even musical leanings:

"New! May 27, 1997: Kevorkian releases jazz CD: A Very Still Life"
otherwise there's some other last minute tweaks i'd like to make maybe so i'll save the reflections for then. besides four hours of sleep for two nights and a crosscountry flight in front of a kid having ear pressurizing problems and taking it out on the seatback in front of him means i'm entitled to some grumpfrump. where's my mead?


today's muzzik:

no music, the sound of bart and neighbordogs.


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