My dream--June 1995

Well, last night I had the most vivid and wonderful dream of my life. The beginning is foggy, but the rest is clear.

Somehow I was in Michael Jackson's California house/mansion. We were talking, there was a lot of sexual tension, not uncomfortable, and I was being very affectionate. It didn't seem unnatural, but we were still strangers. He wasn't allowing me all of the contact I wanted, but I did not feel rejected either. He was friendly and we were talking. At one point I was telling him how my first lessons of racism were based on experiences regarding him and my admiration for him. I talked about how he had molded much of my childhood ideology and commitment to seving people. As we talked I remember being was too good to be real and I was waiting for his strangeness to bother me. I pondered telling him that but conversation shifted. We were laughing and enjoying ourselves, he was seated on the fireplace ledge behind and to the side of me. It was moving fast. Then he knelt on his knee, there behind me, I was turned to watch him. Michael asked me to marry him. I was spellbound. My mind raced and I thought to myself, he will be so strange and I will hurt him, leave him eventually. Greed plaqued my mind as the benefits of marrying him sunk in. I laughed a bit cautiously, disbelieving, "You're already married." He took off up the giant carpeted stairwell like a shy child and I bounded after him overwhelmed with curiousity. He explained that the marriage was a hoax and may've even teased my belief in it. He needed to look married and she needed something, it may have been some sort of escape. They didn't live together. I knew this all and in my mind castigated his silly option of sleeping miles apart from her on their wedding night.

Michael tore through some rooms then ran up even more flights but I stopped. I heard the clatter of animals and was fearful. Michael was talking with the animals, he was out of my site. I said, "But you don't have any snakes any more" and he confirmed, using some more technical reptile term, that he no longer had any. He was hugging a monkey, I could hear, and I told him I was too scared to come up. He said that was fine. Michael descended then entered another room and I followed closely behind, my mind stimulated to the breaking point. The rooms were messy and a bit bare. One was a large walk-in closet, it was a bit too narrow to be a room inthat house. A hanging pole, whatever you call it, displayed dozens of leotards, many sequined. They were thrown on the floor and a sandwhich was on the counter. The rug was light brown. He was searching for something but I dont know what. I asked if we could go to Morroco and he said we could go anywhere we wanted.

I awoke to Aunt Irene's voice talking to Sarah out front looking at mommy's flowers.