drink

`dad drank.`

My dad drank. First scotch, then gin, then vodka, then wine.

I remember him often with a drink,

but I was too young to know him as an alcoholic.

colin my brother is shocked at that confession, it was so much a part of his life. Later, talking to mom, she would use that explain so much -

temper, inconstancy, lies (any addiction), abuse

from what I hear an otherwise wonderful man became a severely depressing asshole due to drink -

thought I would suppose that his death by suicide might inspire some revision -

either way, he didn't heal himself enough to get his shit together out of alcoholism.

so he suffered, right? we all suffer. many suffer worse than he (if such things can be judged)

I'm a baby born in the midst of a man's alcoholic stupor

why did he have kids?

why did he drink?
why did he start?

it's complicated my feelings about alcohol.